I feel my skills are coming along nicely, but there's always room for improvement. I'm often complemented on my work, which I appreciate even when I can see the flaws others can't. As an artist I embrace that, because I know I WANT to get better, and CAN get better; and seeing my flaws as I do I can only work on them.

Lately though, my desire to improve only complicates me. I live in an uninspiring town and my job has nothing to do with what I'm skilled in. I know of no one that I can share and learn from, nor a job I can feel comfortable in. I wove this myself though, because in my ignorance over three years ago I dumbly decided to quit college in favour of the coin. Stupid decision, one that comes back to kick me in the ass often. My mind has only expanded since, and I am more focused, but that changes nothing. I wish I was more focused and willing then as I am now.

To right my wrongs, if that is possible, I'm reading countless books and tutorials on methods I can incorporate into my skill. Within a year I feel I have progressed exponentially and I yearn to only get better. I am constantly looking for anyone to personally learn from, but I fear I'm on my own there; that privilege leaving me when I left college.

I have perhaps gained one beautiful thing through my folly: belonging to such an inspiring woman. She has no skill in art herself but her encouragement and wisdom are a priceless package. If I had not left college to work where I am now I would not have met her.

So, my advise to anyone who may have read my journal: if you love what you're doing pursue it to its heights. There are so many people here with such great gifts I hope they won't misuse. I will continue to do what I do without ceasing to progress, and I hope those with such a passion will do the same.

D